Today is a beautiful day on all levels. I worked hard, played well, didn’t seem to be rushing mindlessly, and called someone I hadn’t connected with in a while. Wanting to keep the good day going, I invited a few friends to “come for sunset”. The most fun way for me to entertain is on my terrace overlooking the Gulf. For tonight’s guests, I made a few simple hors d’oueves, selected the wine, chose the music, and decided which plates and napkins fit the mood.
Just before my guests arrive I find myself sitting on the deck and smiling. I
realize that I love this moment, the moment before “it” all begins. Do you know what I mean? Right before the guests arrive, I feel very happy. My condo is sparkling clean, it’s a good hair day, the air is warm with a slight breeze off the Gulf….calm, quiet, with only the soft sounds of the tiny waves breaking below. I wish I could capture this feeling of “the moment before”. I know for some people this moment before entertaining is nerve wracking, but not for me. I love the moment before.
In a few moments, the doorbell will ring, the calm will be disrupted, and
there will the laughter, easy conversation about what’s happening on the island, and other stories that friends share with one another. As I open the door, there will be the sound of heels clicking on the marble floors, corks popping, and instrumental Beetle’s songs in the background. And even the Gulf will sound louder as if trying to complete with the changed environment. I will love those moments too. But it is the moment before that is most precious for me. I am very aware of me and this point in time. I feel happy…grateful for what is and who I am. I am alone at this moment and alone is fine.
Winnie the Pooh knows what I am talking about. “Well,” said Pooh,
“what I like best,” and then he had to stop and think. Because although eating honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn’t know what it was called. (A.A. Milne)” I don’t know what it’s called either, but I need a word for it because it is such an incredible moment. For now I shall have to refer to it as “the moment before.”
I have the same feeling the moment before I am going to speak to a large audience. That might sound odd but you see I am at my best in front of a crowd. I am passionate about my topic and have researched it well. I know I will add value to most people in my audience and have a strong impact on a few. The moment before I walk to the podium, I have that same feeling I have right now on my terrace before my guests arrive. The moments after I have finished speaking along with the applause, accolades and a line of people waiting to introduce themselves and share their story are of course great, too. But nothing beats that moment before.
I wonder if it is when I am truly staying in the moment, right there, not reminiscing and not anticipating, I am just there. I need that feeling more often. I miss the “moment before” more times than I tune in to it, because too often, I am anticipating what is coming next, or mulling over what just occurred. But it is more than just staying in the present…much more. It is being there completely, feeling as though this moment is where the world is as it should be for me.
And how about you? Do you have favorite moments before?