I often find myself running a concern through one of my sons, Michael Jr. While he is not a practicing attorney, his law school education truly taught him invaluable critical thinking skills. As a result, when faced with a problem, he “nets things out” basing his opinion on facts not emotions, quickly gets to the bottom line of what needs to be done, and takes action. He is a tremendous resource for me especially since I do not have even a glimmer of that skill set.
My lack of critical thinking skills also describes one of my clients, a young woman struggling to get her life on an even keel. We spend considerable time on the phone going over what she wishes to change to improve her life, yet something happens from the point of our agreed upon plan on the phone to actual execution of the plan. More specifically, there is no execution. I shared with Michael my frustration with her lack of progress and my lack of success with her, and he said quickly and simply,
“Some people add rocks to your back pack.”
Interesting, I thought. Yes, some people make our lives more difficult, more cumbersome, actually heavier. We can attempt to work with them carefully so that they create a plan they are comfortable with, but we cannot make them follow the plan. Maybe for them just having someone to listen to their plight gets them though the immediate struggle and that is enough. I will continue to be there to listen and will have to recognize my limitations to do much more.
We can all think of one or more people in our lives who “add rocks to our back pack”, but all of a sudden I am questioning if I add rocks to someone else’s back pack. I will give that more thought. I do not want to add weight to anyone’s life with my own concerns about the chaos in the world, with my anxiety about traveling, or my increasing concern about the aging process. Women with high successtrogen use critical thinking skills to resolve their own worries and concerns, and rather than just complain, they seek the resource they need to resolve their own issue.
How about you, are you weighed down by the rocks someone else has handed you? Oh and by the way, are you in any way adding weight to someone else’s back pack?