Recently in the Hamptons, I walked through a very old cemetery. I couldn’t read much of what was engraved on the weather battered tombstones but one woman was recognized for being a faithful wife and good mother. A young child was recognized for his ability to make others laugh and a fire fighter was noted for saving lives. I wondered for a moment what perhaps we all wonder, what would people say about me? I quickly reminded myself that my wish is to be cremated, so there will be no tombstone claiming I was “the best mom ever”, “the woman of a man’s dreams”, or “the best adjunct professor ever at the University of South Florida.” Whatever people think of me may be verbally stated (or whispered !) but nothing about me will be carved in stone anywhere, anytime.
What would I hope they would say about me? I would like people to say that I brought joy, taught them something, or that I changed the way they behave. I know that Pat will say I was her “fellow Jersey girl”, Bonnie will say that I was a good story teller, and Carole will offer that I was a great x-wife. Helen will tell the story of the coconut cake and how hard she laughed. And while the jury is still out, I hope another friend says that he chose me and was glad he did.
Recently while browsing in Nordstrom I saw a t-shirt that read “I fly with my own set of wings”–and there it was. That was what I would like to be remembered as, a woman who “flew with her own wings”–that I did things my way, made decisions for myself accepting the consequences of my sometimes impulsive behavior, and I made life happen, all because I knew I had wings.
Women with high SUCCESSTROGEN fly with their own wings. They have a strong air of independence about them. It is not that they do not need anyone, but they do not depend on any other for their happiness. They think for themselves, are self-directed and self-motivated. They demonstrate courage and conviction in both their words and their behavior.
If you have never flown by your own wings, I suspect it is a bit scary at first. But the idea is that once you are sure of who you are, you then add the guts, focus, persistence and faith to fly with your own wings. Your own wings fit like no other and once you realize you have them and rely on them, you will soar!
We all know some successful women who have made a career of their dreams, allowing themselves to be driven by their passion. They exude happiness. They have purpose and meaning and they generate a community of others also passionate about what they are doing. When you enter their “space”, there is a buzz, a happy buzz, a productive buzz. People around them are not complaining, they are working together, creating, planning, fixing to accomplish their goals. They all could be sporting that t-shirt in Nordstrom, because they all
“…fly by their own wings.”
Have I encouraged you to dust off your wings and test them out again? Your life may have changed somewhat and you may need to adjust the old wings to better enable you to take off, but do it. Don’t wait any longer to “fly by your own wings”,and take charge of your own life.
Fly by your own wings and enjoy the journey!